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July 21, 2011

How old were you when your Dad died? What was the cause of his death? How old was he when he died?

I was forty-one when my Dad died.  He died in March of 1984.  We had moved out of state in August of the previous year and I felt guilty because he had been hospitalized earlier in '83.  He seemed to be in good health through the fall and winter.  He, even, came out and helped my daughter, who was still living instate, to clean off the snow in the winter.  In March, he was hospitalized and died days later.  He was put on life support so I could see him before they pronounced him dead.  I didn't want to see him that way and refused to go in his room.  I wanted to remember him the way he looked when I saw him last.  A nun came and led us in prayer while the nurses turned off the machine that was keeping his body alive.  I saw him again at the funeral home after the mortician had changed him back to what he had looked like before he died.  Poor Mom.  Dad had been her life.  Now, she would have to learn to do herself all the things Dad had always done for her.  She held up well during the funeral and the reception afterwards.  I had to leave to go back home earlier than I would have liked but the children had to go back to school.  On the trip home, I was driving with my youngest, who was just a toddler at the time, and I felt that Dad was with me all the way to my front door.  When I arrived home, I didn't feel his presence anymore.  He had seen me home and could leave.                                                                                                                                                       He had been diagnosed with liver cancer earlier.  There was no treatment for that cancer then and still today.  The Doctor told us he had a carcenoid that must have broken loose from wherever it had been growing and lodged in the liver.  He said Dad may have harbored that for forty or fifty years.
He was seventy.  He was born in December of 1913.  I still miss him.

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